18 things I love about October

Leaves dancing in the street.

Snow on Pikes Peak.

Taking the sunshades down from my kitchen skylights.

Pumpkin-flavored anything and everything. (Except pumpkin-flavored macaroni and cheese. Which I have tried...and didn't like.)

The anticipation and excitement of little ones looking forward to Halloween. Not just my grandsons but even those I hear in stores, chattering away to Mom about the costumes they want, what their friends plan to be, the candy they love.

Lady in White, which I watch this time of year every year.

Sweater weather.

Sock and slipper weather, too.

Kids in Halloween costumes. Especially when they look like this:

Or this:

(Megan will surely one day pay for the cuteness she foisted upon her boys.)

Indian Summer. Far less hot and harsh than regular summer.

No more watering or worrying about the flowers and more in the front yard, back yard, side yard.

No more fans scattered about the house.

Snuggling once again with my cat Abby, who was continually pushed away during hot weather.

Blankets back on the beds. And curling up under them for my nightly read.

The first wafts of smoke from wood burning in a neighbor's fireplace. (We typically wait til November to burn a fire in ours.)

Caramel apple taffy.

Visits with my grandsons. We always visit in October. This year I'm fortunate to have two visits planned—one at the end of this week, another at the end of the month. An extra-special reason to love this October in particular.

Today's question:

What do you love about October?

Pit bulls, owl quotes, and guilty babies

As long-time readers may have noticed—because of postings here and here, to name a few—I'm continually amused and sometimes even touched by the search terms that lead people to Grandma's Briefs.

Time again for me to share with you those that most make me go "Huh?"

First off, let me say that other than phrases related to grandmas and grandsons, always at the top of the query list for my site is pit bull. Why? Well, my dog Mickey is part pit bull (other part pointer). I occasionally blog about him. Apparently a lot of people are searching—be it out of love, fear, or disdain—for information on animals that look and act much like my Mickey. All I can figure is I need to start another blog, perhaps called Pit Bull Briefs. I have no doubt, according to my list of query terms, that it would be quite popular—at least on the search engines.

Other than pit bull, here are some of my more curious queries in the last week, plus links to what the unsuspecting searchers ended up being directed to.

I love macaroni — Believe it or not, in the past week I've had not only one person but two who reached Grandma's Briefs by typing that into the Google search bar. I do love macaroni, especially when paired with cheese. I have a feeling my fellow mac lovers were a little disappointed, though, when their love affair led them here.

Owl quotes — I'm not sure how, when, or why someone might think they'd find quotes from owls online (Is it even possible to quote an owl? Do they say anything quote worthy? In a language we'd understand?), but again, not just one but two people got here looking for wisdom from owls. Instead, they got this, which does feature a cool owl photo (not by me), but nothing uttered by an owl, not even a hoo-hoo of any sort.

Scholarships for grandmas — If there is such a thing, I want to sign up, too. Maybe the searcher, if they happen to be reading this, will share the successful results from their search. This sponsored post certainly didn't get them any closer to the pot of gold they were searching for.

Not just a chicken bagel recipe — I've heard of several kinds of bagels but never a chicken bagel. They certainly got something that's not just a chicken bagel recipe when they stumbled upon my Homemade Bagels post.

Guilty baby — This one makes me sad, to be quite honest. Babies are innocent, guiltless beings—even when at their most frustrating. I worry why one might search for that term and what they plan to do to the baby they assume is guilty. It's even more disconcerting when seeing that three people used that specific search term and ended up on Grandma's Briefs. I hope they thought twice about the guilt of the child in question when they were met with my post on being a guilt-ridden grandma.

So not guilty!

"Stinky diaper" — Yes, it even had the quote marks around it. If a dirty diaper was a challenge for them, I can only imagine what they thought when landing on my Tough (Grand) Mudder post.

Hide in leaves — If you need directions on how to do it, you're seriously missing out on the fallen leaf fun. Bubby had no trouble figuring it out, as evidenced here.

What is one word for not improved — Apparently this person never heard of an online thesaurus. I doubt this post gave them what they sought. Though maybe they enjoyed the photo of Bubby and Mac.

What to write about a grandson's smile — Nothing curious about that one, really. It's just a sweet search. And one that made me smile. I hope what they found here helped them write what they'd hoped to — and made them smile.

Today's question:

What did you last search for online?

9 ways to lift a grandma's spirits

I've been feeling a little down lately because I can't get my <cuss> wireless network to work in my house. Why is wireless that important? Because my work takes place online, and I prefer—sometimes need—to do that work wirelessly. Plus, I just plain want it, and that should be good enough reason.

These are my wireless devices that previously networked nicely, some for years:

• My computer

• Jim's computer

• My iPhone

• My wi-fi radio

• My printer

• Netflix

They did just fine up until last Wednesday. Then *poof* the wireless went wacko for reasons unknown. Now the only devices working are my computer and my wi-fi radio. No computer time for Jim. No Netflix for either of us.

Not being able to figure out why is making me crazy. Even more so now that when the Comcast tech visited yesterday, he tested all the vitals, replaced cables, scratched his head, said, "I've never run into such a thing," then apologetically told me I'm on my own since I do have one computer working, proving my Internet works and wireless connectivity isn't their job.

In light of the craziness (and crabbiness) my computer connectivity issue has caused, I'm in need of some serious spirit lifting. I'm fortunate for these spirit-lifters that made a difference the last few days:

1. A weekend visit from my youngest.

2. An afternoon with my mom and sister, at the urging—and chauffeuring—of my youngest.

3. Friday food and fun with my youngest, oldest, and hubby.

4. Videos of Bubby and Mac.

5. A text from a friend telling me she's at an outdoor wedding at a public garden venue and it reminds her of my back yard.

6. Picking my one and only zucchini from my garden. (At least I got one, which I keep telling myself is far better than none.)

7. New reading glasses—three pair, in fact, courtesy of the combo pack at Wal-mart.

8. A check for freelance work that came sooner than expected.

9. Only 16 days left until Jim and I fly to the desert to see Bubby and Mac again.

Despite still seeking the ultimate spirit lifter of all—a solution to my wi-fi woes—those are the things that helped, those are the things I need to keep in mind and focus on.

And I'll do exactly that—after I check just one more setting that just might be the answer...

photo: stock.xchng/channah

Today's fill-in-the-blank:

__________ always lifts my spirits when I'm feeling down.

Four 'fun' parental duties I didn't find so fun

Tooth Fairy duty. Tuesday's question about Tooth Fairy rates reminded me how much I didn't like playing Tooth Fairy when my daughters were young. I didn't like it at all. Not because I didn't want to reward my girls for having lost a tooth but because playing Tooth Fairy scared the <cuss> out of me. Seriously. Every time one of the girls went to sleep with high hopes of finding a dollar under her pillow upon awaking (yes, our rate was $1 per tooth), I dreaded having to sneak into the room, stealthily remove a tooth wadded up in tissue from under the pillow, and replace it with a buck. I just knew I'd be midway through the task, with my hand under a sleepy head while feeling for a papery wad, when the little girl's head would slowly turn my way and her eyes would pop right open and stare at me like a crazed Chucky-type doll.

Considering such scenarios scared me to no end. In fact, it scared me so much I sometimes accidentally on purposeforgot one of my children had gone to bed with high hopes of a dollar magically appearing in the night. 'Twas so much easier and less anxiety producing—for me, at least—to apologize come morning for the Tooth Fairy's poor scheduling then pretend she (or he?) had shown up and made the tooth/dollar trade while the girls were at school. Or, to out of guilt give my daughters their proper due, I'd just steel myself all day for the task, then come nightfall get the stupid duty over as quickly as possible. Which is why the Tooth Fairy would sometimes forget; a day or two preparing myself helped. Get in, grab the tooth, drop the dollar, get out. As quickly as possible! And don't look at her face while doing it!

Oh, the lengths we moms go to in order to convince our kids it's okay to allow charming characters with tooth fetishes into their rooms at night.

Bath time. Yes, bath time for many is a lovely and peaceful nightly ritual shared by mother and child. Not when you have three children to bathe at one time. Bath nights were hell, I mean, <cuss> in our household when the girls were little. At least for me. Thirty minutes of three little girls complaining the others were taking all the space...or all the bubbles...or all the water—yes, all the water!—was not fun. Thirty minutes of repeating, Look up! Look up! Look up! as I shampooed and rinsed and listened to at least one of the girls—sometimes all three of them—crying that they had soap in their eyes was not fun. Even the Rub-A-Dub Doggie with the swivel head wasn't distraction enough to make for fun and frivolous tub time. For any of us.

Sure, it would have been smart to bathe one girl at a time. But with a husband working three jobs, thus gone during bath time, who the heck would have watched the other two (remember, the girls are consecutive ages—16 months between the first two, 19 months between the second two) while I joyfully splished, splashed, and shampooed one at a time? Wasn't happening. I was quite thankful when Brianna became old enough to shower instead of being one of the bathers.

Interesting aside: As a grandma, I still dread bath time...at least when I have to bathe both Bubby and Mac at the same time. When I bathe them separately, it truly is one of the most enjoyable of all grandma duties. When they're together, not so enjoyable. So we opt for individual bath times—as long as there's someone else to entertain the non-bather while the bather and I splish, splash, and enjoy the moment.

Slumber parties. As a mother to three daughters, you'd think I'd be a pro at slumber parties. The girls had a lot of them growing up. Heck, I threw a few of my own accord, as I was a Girl Scout leader for many years and slumber parties were a great bonding experience for the troop. At least that was the original intention.

Just like the slumber parties thrown for my daughters' birthdays and more, though, good intentions at the outset of a slumber party flew out the window sometime soon after midnight when the cattiness of tired and cranky girls brought out the worst in everyone. Including me. By 2 a.m. I was usually gritting my teeth and saying to myself, "I wish they would just go home!" Funny thing is, that was often about the same time whichever daughter of mine was hosting the event would creep up the stairs and into my room to say exactly the same thing: "I wish they would Just. Go. Home."

Of course, we'd all forget about how very un-fun slumber parties were come time to consider having another...and another...and another.

Mall shopping. Being mother to three daughters also meant I was supposed to love clothes shopping with my girls. Seems having my kids at a very early age led to me missing that memo, that lesson in the parenting preparedness classes, for I didn't simply dislike shopping at the mall, I hated it. So much so that I did all I could to avoid it.

Back-to-school shopping was particularly dreadful, at the mall or anywhere else. Reason being, for the most part, because money was always tight, and trying to please three fashion-conscious girls on a limited budget was impossible. Which resulted in many tears—and not just from them. Even when we did manage to have enough money for a planned purchase, there were still tears, especially from one particularly difficult shopper we won't name or point out that she's my middle child and mother to my grandsons.

Ironically, Megan loved shopping most of all, was the one most distressed by my aversion to shopping. Strolling the mall together was supposedly the ultimate mother/daughter activity, the best way for girlie-girls to bond with their mamas. Only, I wasn't the girlie-girl kind of mom Megan longed for. Add my hate for shopping to the long list of other girlie things I didn't do—paint my nails, accessorize correctly (or at all), chat endlessly on the phone for no reason—and it's clear why Megan thought for many years that she had surely been adopted.

As a mom, I was supposed to have fun doing all those things above. I didn't. Maybe you feel the same.

Fortunately my list of things I did have fun doing as a parent is longer. Simply remove from the job description the four duties above and all that's left is what I had fun doing.

Well, for the most part.

Dropping a child off at college wasn't all that fun. Saying goodbye as they packed up the last of their closets and left the nest for good wasn't so much fun either.

Maybe you feel the same.

photos: stock.xchng (click photos for details)

Today's question:

What supposedly fun parental duties did you find not so fun?