Grilled Gramcracker

This post is not a recipe. And that post title above does not include a typo. For this post does include grilling and it does include a Gramcracker. But it is not a recipe for an incorrectly spelled graham cracker goodie.

No, my friends, this is a Grilled Grandma feature in which I grill up a grandma affectionately known to her grandchildren as Gramcracker.

What is a Grilled Grandma? those new to Grandma's Briefs may ask. Well, a Grilled Grandma is a grandma whom I've grilled with some grandma-related questions, and she's graciously responded with answers and photos. Here is Grilled Grandma Joan, aka Gramcracker.

How many children do you have? Two; my son Treg and daughter Tracy.

How many grandchildren? What are their ages? Five. Treg’s girls, ages 14 and 11, and Tracy’s son 8 and almost 5 yo boy/girl twins.

Any great grandchildren? No way, not any time soon!

What do your grandchildren call you? Gramcracker or Grandma most of the time; Grams and Gramps when referring to both of us.

Other than the initial elation, what was your first concern upon hearing you would be a grandmother? No negative concerns......just that she would be several states away. But as soon as she was born, my son and daughter-in-law decided to quit their jobs, pack a moving truck and leave our home town of Kalamazoo, Michigan to move near us here in Georgia. They wanted her to be part of our daily lives, and for us to be part of hers.... thus our grandparenting journey began. She was 2 months old when they pulled into our cul-de-sac and the neighbors helped us unload. They lived with us a short while until they found jobs and a home of their own a few minutes away!

How often do you get to see your grandchildren? When the girls were 3 and 6, my son was transferred from here to California. No time to be sad as our first grandson was born two weeks before they left! We pretty much see the girls every couple months. We rent a beach house near them and store a car, bikes and tubs of clothes which makes it easier. The girls spend two weeks at G & G’s house every summer and the whole CA gang joins us every other Christmas! My daughter lives near us and she has boy/girl twins in addition to her big guy! I retired from teaching upon his phone call at age 2 1/2 announcing “Mama has two babies in her belly” and I’ve been along for the ride ever since! We see these three every weekend and holidays and school events and sick days etc. We have them for fun sleepovers, but now starting one at a time......easier on us and I love the 1-1 time with each child!

What is the best thing about being a grandma? Instant playmates and forever friends! They keep me young and fun; always ready to try new things. My Sunshine girl taught me to text and we learned stand up paddleboarding together! My Flower, granddaughter #2, encourages me with edgier fashion ideas, joins me in tennis and has taught me to go crabbing and climb the jetty rocks in their ocean backyard! As soon as he was old enough, I introduced my shining Star (grandson # 1) to ice skating and roller skating! The Littles keep me in stitches with their ongoing comedy act. We have fun jumping at the bouncy places and doing yoga together. All five are teaching me fun wii games!!!

What is the most challenging part of being a grandma? Keeping it “fair” when there’s more than one around! Have to be creative and use slight of hand sometimes! I was in elementary education....so still resort to “choose a number, you can be first next time or the old standby......life’s not always fair!”

Describe a recent time that one (or more) of your grandchildren made you laugh out loud. They are all blessed with a sense of humor... plus perfect timing and delivery! One incident that comes to mind: I’ve never been one to cuss, but once my son was driving a bit too zippily for me and I couldn’t help but exclaim “S***! D***! God! From the backseat, my granddaughter says “that’s not how it goes, Grandma.....you’re supposed to say God D*** It and Oh S***!”  Needless to say my son slowed down as we laughed our heads off!

What is your favorite thing to do with grandchildren who visit your house? Silly tea parties, dress-up, playing school on the chalk/white boards in the garage with the younger ones. The visit usually includes sleeping over......so making cookies and watching a movie is part of our routine! We rent a place for a month or so every fall near my son in Ventura......so it’s a real treat for the girls to stay over with us in the beach cottage a few steps from the sand and waves! They too love making cookies and staying up late with a good movie or game!

What is your favorite thing to do when visiting grandchildren at their house? See their rooms! They always have little treasures to share or new toys and/or clothes to show off! It’s awesome to see their interests and personalities reflected in their bedrooms....no matter what age! Since the girls live on the beach.....we make the most of playtime there....our home away from home! The younger kids have thick woods in their backyard.......so we get to spot deer, enjoy autumn leaves and watch from the deck as they play on, in and around everything that is NOT a toy or playscape! “Yikes” I say, “relax” my daughter says!

How do you maintain the bond between yourself and your grandchildren between visits? I write the big girls letters, send cards, pictures and little gifts in the mail. We talk on the phone and now they have their own cells and email so we keep in contact pretty much every day. Lately they’ve been texting me on the way to and from school. :)  I see the younger kids every weekend; and I talk with each one during the week by phone....telling them something the cat has done or about a new ice cream we’ve tried etc. I make cutesy, crafty stuff for all of them and they know I put myself into it. Homemade cards, little poems, envelopes filled with bunches of crunchy fall leaves, matching tees with their names stitched on. We have committed to taking each grandchild on a vacation of their choice around age 12; so there’s lots of photos and discussions of possible destinations. We’ve been dogsledding in Alaska already with our oldest, and planning NYC for spring break with our 11 year old. (she was born 9/12/01......so this is a trip with special meaning for us in addition to a great city adventure!) The younger kids seem to be stuck on the Great Wall of China right now.....we’ll see!!!

What do you most want to pass along to your grandchildren? Finding delight and wonder in life. And that they will never regret being kind and sharing happiness with others.

What is one word you hope your grandkids think of when they think of you? Fun-loving. The phrase I use all the time is “I love it!” and they all say it now.

What is one thing you wish you had learned earlier as a grandparent? This is a hard one.....never thought of this. I know I’m a good Grandma because I learned from my own grandmother. She always gave me undivided time and attention and made me feel special....so I’ve just done the same. And I tell my eldest granddaughter she is helping me learn grandparenting as we both grow along!

What one bit of advice would you give a new grandma? Be a calm, loving and engaged presence in the child’s life, however you can. Distance doesn’t matter....as you and I have discovered, Lisa.  And follow your heart always! I think we all used our heads pretty much raising our own kids.....but now using your heart to guide you is the best thing in the world for grandkid and grandparent!

Do you have a website or blog? My blog is at http://www.gramcrackercrumbs.com/  The kids call me Gramcracker and Crumbs represents the bits and pieces of our lives I like to write about. I also have a Facebook page of the same name....but my more in-depth blog is a work in progress as I learn how to reach audiences, attach buttons, link etc. Any tips from your readers is appreciated! I am also on Pinterest as http://pinterest.com/pollyannajoan/gramcracker-crumbs/.

Dear Readers: If you'd like to nominate a grandma for grilling—yourself or any other grandma—please e-mail me her first name and e-mail address and I'll take care of the rest. Thank you!

Grilled Grandma: Linda

How many children do you have? I have 3 children—a son and 2 daughters.

How many grandchildren? What are their ages? I have 8 grandchildren, including my partner's 5 grandchildren. They range from 22 months to 15 years old.

What do your grandchildren call you? They call me Grandma, or GrandmaLinda.

After the initial elation, what was your first concern upon hearing you would soon be a grandmother? My biggest concern at first, was not being able to afford the things I wanted to give them, and that I didn't have a nice place for them to come and stay with me. But I've learned from the children that those things don't matter one bit.

How often do you get to see your grandchildren? I'm so lucky to be with the baby 3-4 days a week, because I'm his Grannny-Nanny, and I see the other kids at least a couple times a month.

What is the best thing about being a grandma? The best part of being a grandmother, besides having precious, adorable little people to dote on, who adore you, is being able to be an important family symbol of both the past and the future. I can give them roots, sharing stories of the past. And for their future: I'm providing a model, by the way I live my life, and by my acceptance, I'm teaching them to believe in themselves, so they can do anything!

What is the most challenging part of being a grandma? The most challenging thing for me, is on holidays, or special occasions, showing grace and consideration for the exes and the extended family. Relatives are often a little uncomfortable because we are divorced grandparents, and so are other family members. Sometimes, I just have to use discretion and wisdom about what I say, or where I seat people or sit myself. Other times we don't get invited, and I must not be sensitive, because it's part of the natural fallout of divorce in families. I have to be careful not to be defensive or hurt by things others may say unwittingly, and I have to be a peacemaker. I want to show grace and dignity, and I pray about this. It's really important to me to be a wise, strong, positive model to my kids, and my sisters, and everyone in the family. I take being the "family matriarch " very seriously!

Describe a recent time that one (or more) of your grandchildren made you laugh out loud. I laugh out loud all the time, the children say and do such funny things. Yesterday, the baby ate a handful of sand from his brand new sandbox, I swooped it out and I started spitting in the yard, telling him to spit, but he just giggled and crunched his little teeth on the grit.

What is your favorite thing to do with grandchildren who visit your house? At my house, we do art projects, or make cookies.

What is your favorite thing to do when visiting grandchildren at their house? At their homes, we have tea parties, watch funny movies, or sing karaoke.

How do you maintain the bond between yourself and your grandchildren between visits? The older ones keep in touch by texting me or calling me, and I (spy on) watch them on Facebook. The best way to bond with the little ones is to make sure to be a support to the parents, make sure they know I'll always be there when they need me.

What do you most want to pass along to your grandchildren? I want to pass along a legacy of love; self-love, God's love and love for each other.

What is one word you hope your grandkids think of when they think of you? One word that will remind them of me—I hope it's " love.”

What is one thing you wish you had learned earlier as a grandparent? I wish I'd learned earlier to have serenity, not to worry about anything, for things usually work out okay after all.

What one bit of advice would you give a new grandma? If I was to give any advice to a new grandma, I would say, don't worry about material things that you are unable to give, or compare yourself to other grandmothers. Just be yourself—give yourself, it's you they want and need.

Accept the grandchildren, just as they are. Don't compare them or boast to one parent about the other's child.

There are inexpensive and free, inspirational and fun things to do with your grandkids. Buy used books to give and read to them,

Dollar stores, thrift shops, yard sales have good stuff, when you really must buy something. Bubbles, homemade playdough, flower seeds, any paper---- these are all resources for activities to do with your grandchild. Take them to a park, play, sing and dance with them, tell them about when you were young, and listen to them!  Remember that the little things are really the big things.

Do you have a website or blog? What is it about? I have a website about my work, www.selectiveresidentialservices.blogspot.com, and two business pages on Facebook, for Selective Residential Services, and Vintage Treasures, and an Etsy shop, www.etsy.com/shop/grandmalay. My blog is www.grandmalay.blogspot.com, and it's about being a grandma, vintage decorating, gardening, family and home life, and my adventures. I want to do some painted furniture project demos next. I like to share lots of great quotes and affirmations on my blog, too.