Grandma's Briefs

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Toddler games: Keep-Away with my insurance company

I like playing games with toddlers as much as the next grandma. Not so much, though, when it's my insurance company playing the part of opponent.

toddler Rx ball

To wit: I recently visited my doctor to figure out what to do about my overwhelming fatigue (stupid MS). She prescribed a medication, zapped the request electronically to the pharmacy while I waited—and was met with an immediate request for preauthorization through my insurance.

Let the games begin...!

"Lisa wants this," she told the insurance company. "Can we please have some."

"No! We don't want to share," the insurance rep teased.

"But she needs it," my doctor responded. "And you have lots."

"Prove she needs it," she was told. "Then maybe we'll let her try it. Maybe."

So she proved it.

"No! She still can't have it!" the toddler, er, insurance rep said. "It's mine!"

Back and forth we went playing keep-away. For three weeks. I'd see the ball, race to grab it, and be offered only a nyah, nyah!

My pharmacy got involved, begged the insurance company to play nice. "C'mon...," they said. "Let Lisa have it."

All to no avail. "No! No! No!" insurance responded, again and again and again.

The game wore me out. Wore out my doctor and pharmacy, too.

"Nevermind, then," my doctor told the insurance company. "We don't want to play anymore. I'm giving Lisa something else. Keep your stupid drug!" Or something like that.

My doctor prescribed an alternative drug. One that required no preauthorization. One that skated through the pharmacy. One that seems to work just as well as the drug we begged the insurance company to approve.

Two days later my doctor's assistant telephoned me. "Get this!" she said. "The insurance company said you can have it." Plus 15 refills!

Tell them I don't want it, I wanted to say. (I can play the toddler game, too. My grandkids give me plenty of practice.)

That's not what I said, of course. Instead, I chuckled, grabbed the approval, and I held on tight.

When it comes to toddler games, you take your wins where you can find them.

Today's question:

What organization (or individual) do you least enjoy playing similar toddler games with?